Quitting Smoking
Another Sure-fire Plan
Following the unmitigated success of the Small Monkey
weight loss plan, we are pleased to offer the following:
By the Small Monkey
Back
The Small Monkey Guaranteed Quit Smoking Plan
Following customer feedback, we would be delighted to
expand on how best to achieve this:
Just follow these simple steps:

1.  Don't smoke cigarettes.
Note:  

In the event that you find yourself without the necessary
willpower and motivation to carry out this plan, rest
assured that paying your local pharmacist, hypnotist
and/or acupuncturist several hundred dollars a month
(each) for patches, gum, short naps, being stabbed with
tiny needles etc etc only to learn precisely the same
thing is far more painful.  Once again, you're welcome.
1.  Don't buy any cigarettes.

2.  Don't accept any cigarettes from anyone else.

3.  Don't put any cigarettes into your mouth.

4.  Don't light any cigarettes.

5.  Don't inhale any cigarette smoke.


You don't even need to follow all of these steps - any
single one, if followed correctly, will cause you to quit
smoking.  Brilliant, isn't it?


You're welcome.
The Small Monkey Expanded Guaranteed Quit
Smoking Plan